Twin Worlds Restoration

Twin Worlds Restoration
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DM(s) neobolts
Guest DM(s) Aksani, Valeria, Cerberus7
System D&D 5e

After a series of devastating wars, old nations and newly emerged powers are pushing out to claim land. A unlikely group of heroes representing different interests are thrown together after a summit of nations.

Setting

The lands of Parasonnea are home to humans, dragons, elves, dwarves, dragonborn, and many other races. Arcane magic is studied and a code of honorable combat has been followed at times.
The Twin Worlds have endured many wars. In recent memory, the Quan'thosk'alys Wars of 25 years ago brought widespread devastation in the form of corrupting ichor. Large portions of the Southlands were lost to the ichor. Most of the primary fighting on the world took place in the Southlands. After the war, the destroyed areas were replaced by vast primeval forests thanks to the Stars of Destiny.
A second war only 5 years ago, the War of the Shards, took place on the Southlands. Although not as cataclysmic, that war caused many casualties as well. The people of the Southlands are weary of war, but political tensions are high as the various nations extend out their borders.
One of the key features of the Southlands is the Great Caravan Way, also known as the Ancient Caravan Way. The Great Caravan Way starts in Cyan Gyantto in Gellian and spans the continent all the way to Gloecoast in the Dwarven Alliance. Pilgrims and traders rely on the road being open.

Full entry at Twin Worlds Primer.

PCs

Major NPCs

Allies

Villains

Maps

Session Data

Beneath the blue moon, five adventures move towards their destiny...

Arc 1: Emergence of the Pride

Session 1 - The Summit [3.13.15]
King Gelliar convenes a summit of nations. His hope is to foster better cooperation, a momentous task considering the differing beliefs and distrust that exists. Our of the fighting comes a plan: a group made up of delegation entourage members will undertake a mission to foster cooperation. When the summit representatives are confronted by a young monk named Hallon, Arimiger Larouch insists that the monk be added to the party as well. The five heroes set out to drive the monsters from Forthington Vineyard. They easily dispatch a group of jackals that had taken up residence in a woodcutter's house.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs King Gelliar of Gellian; Ambassador Byron Runestar; Armiger Larouch; Prime Minister Bertuccio; Kogash the III; Krongus the Younger, Crosiarx delegation member; Little Leaf, Wihsperdawn Representative; Lady Thirdius Klenn, Lord of Leiden; Sir Frederick of Klenn, Dragonrider Captain; Lord Forthington, Lord of Leiden; Charliss Belmont, High Priest of Sospitas; Princess Ilianva of Gellian; Rey Royal Counsel Colinor Seedlore, High Priest of Rael; Yorixson Bloodstone, High Cleric of Uminati
Setting Ilianvox, Gellian; Forthington Vineyards, Gellian
Date 13/11/24-13/12/24
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 2 - Forthington Vineyard [3.20.15]
After discovering a young shifter rider that had been felled by the jackals, the heroes press deeper into the grounds of the vineyard. They battle with "small birdmen" inside the cooperage, and having suffered heavy damage in the fight they fall back to the woodcutter's cabin to rest and make merry. A game of "Truth or Dare" is rudely interrupted by flying garden snakes, and the party turns in for the night. The next day they begin to fight their way into the main villa, encountering resistance from goblins inside.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Forthington Vineyard, Gellian
Date 13/22/24-13/23/24
Quotes
  • "As least we know he's a guy now." - Rheya to Myrtle, discussing a streaking Isocerus
  • "Truth or Dare or Snakes!" - Kaiden
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 3 - The Tattooed Orc [3.27.15]
The party attempts to smoke the bad guys out by stopping up their stovepipe. Instead they prevents the villains from burning evidence. The heroes head into the cellars of the Forthington Vinyard's villa to flush out the entrenched foes. Isocerus tries to make nice with the orcs and takes two javelins to the chest for his ill-conceived efforts. The rest of the party faces downs the orcs and both sides have the majority of their people KO'ed. In the end, Rheya and Hallon find themselves facing down a tattooed cleric of Rodesa. Each side believes the other to have the upper hand, and after a short augury spell, the cleric makes a break for it and escapes. The party finds evidence that someone is making tactical scouting maps of the region. They head back to Ilianvox and report in. Afterwards, they spend some time gathering rumors from the locals.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs  ???, tattooed cleric of Rodesa; Krongus the Younger
Setting Forthington Vineyards, Gellian; Ilianvox, Gellian
Date 13/24/24
Quotes n/a
QP 3
Other Info
  • Rheya obtained Agent Rank with the Runestar Foundation
  • Isocerus obtained Red Whisperer Rank with the House Tealgoblet Information Network
Session 4 - The Perversion of Pinkerton [4.3.15]
The party prepares to head out on a pair of missions. First to investigate the lack of trade with the marsh village of Pinkerton. And second, to act as emissaries to the nation of Whisperdawn. Before heading out, Krongus gives Hallon a name to look into in Whisperdawn: Archdruid Kormar. Also, Myrtle hears her old drinking buddy, Borgon the Restless is in town setting up a Gruffmarble Mercenary Guild branch. Eventually, the party gets underway to Pinkerton. While winding through the grain paddies built on the marsh, the party rescues a group of merchants beset by wolves and ravens. One of the merchants is overly amorous towards Hallon, and the others complain that their significant others have spurned them. The party heads into Pinkerton, and notes flowers being sold on every streetcorner under the branding of a gnome named "Two-Lips". They head to the town tavern and work their way through a couple of rounds to smooth over tension with the locals, all of whom have odd romantic fixations towards each other. Kaiden finds himself attracted to the barmaid, Rheya to the barmaid's thuggish husband, and Hallon towards Kaiden. Isocerus and Myrtle have meanwhile obtained a room at the love hotel next door to investigate, and have ordered additional drinks to the room. Rheya, becoming concerned that they are falling into a enchanter's trap, urges the party to retreat back to the merchants camped south of town. Isocerus and Myrtle find themselves in the throws of insatiable lust. Against Rheya's advice, they retire to a tent and proceed to get down to business...repeatedly. After Hallon's merchant admirer unknowingly tips off Two-Lips, the party confronts the gnome in town where he is unloading the last of his flowers before planning to flee. He is easily intimidated into telling the party that a witch north of town is behind the enchantment in the water/beer that was intended to help him sell flowers. The situation is out of hand and not what he agreed to. The party spends the night at Two-Lips farm, and prepares to assault the witch's hideout.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Krongus the Younger
Setting Ilianvox, Gellian; Pinkerton, Gellian
Date 13/24/24-13/27/24
Quotes
  • "Don't forget your penis!" - Horny merchant to a nonplussed Hallon
QP 0
Other Info Adapted from En5ider's The Business of Emotion.
Session 5 - The Owlbear and the Witch [4.10.15]
The next morning is New Year's Eve, and Isocerus is blessed with a brief but confusing visit by Taxil the Eternal and Gurren Lagann. The party then heads to a cave occupied by Hermia the Fey Witch and her pet owlbear. The party is victorious, but afterwards knocks Hermia's cauldron into the river, permanently cursing the town's water supply. Rheya acquires a powerful and mysterious vial containing a subtance used to enhance Hermia's love potion.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Taxil the Eternal; Hermia the Fey Witch
Setting Ilianvox, Gellian; Pinkerton, Gellian
Date 13/28/24-1/4/25
Quotes n/a
QP 3
Other Info Adapted from En5ider's The Business of Emotion.
Session 6 - Journey to the East [4.17.15]
The party travels on to Klenn where the meet with Sir Frederick. From there they said on the SS Manliness to Council Grove in Whisperdawn. From a balcony overlooking the proceedings, the party witnesses a coup d'etat unfolding.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Sire Frederick; Silvercrown, Frederick's dragon; Captain Manly, human male; First Mate Cealy Cogsmash, gnome female eldritch knight; Ol' Barley, elderly human male chef; Anda Dunderdeef, half-orc female; Lunklunk, minotaur male porter; Big Branch, halfling ranger; Archdruid Kormar the "Patient"; Archdruid Parvus of the Canopy (Little Leaf's teacher); Great Druid Olivedrop of Feywilder; Little Leaf
Setting Castle Klenn, Gellian; Council Grove, Whisperdawn
Date 1/4/25-1/24/25
Quotes
  • "Hey idiots! Stop looking at eachother's dicks and get out here!" - Kaiden
  • "I'm just going to have them sing that terrible song everybody likes." - DM
    "The Star Spangled Banner?" - Tonsilrock
QP 0
Other Info
  • Kaiden obtained Disciple Rank with the Church of Valos
Session 7 - The Pride [5.1.15]
As the Pride unleashes a full-scale assualt on Council Grove, the party does what they can to evacuate people. They are betrayed by Little Leaf's friend Big Branch, who escaped. The party parts ways with the SS Manliness and makes their way with refugees north to Inmahge. The city is preparing for a prolonged siege from the Pride. Mage school headmaster Filvendor Everleaf gives the party a letter to King Gelliar explaining the situation and they depart for Ilianvox.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Archdruid Kormar the Deathshaper; Little Leaf; Big Branch; Filvendor Everleaf, Elven Mage School Headmaster
Setting Council Grove, Whisperdawn; Inmahge, Whisperdawn
Date 1/24/25-1/28/25
Quotes
  • "Byuubs" - Anonymous
  • "Technically everyone is half centaur." - Anonymous
  • "Are there any tiny dwarf orphans?" - Myrtle
    "Dwarphans?" - Isocerus
QP 0
Other Info n/a

Arc 2: The Reclaiming of Castle Shaddack

Session 8 - Bellewether [5.8.15]
King Gelliar reacts to the letter delivered by the party; he sends Sir Frederick and Lord Action to the border town of Cyan Gyanyto, but troops movements are hampered by a lack of cooperation from Mothergreen. Meanwhile, the party heads southeast to clear out the monster-filled Castle Shaddack. In the nearby city of Bellewether, they meet the city's protectors, the grim and inhospitable Bellsie Bellewether and the happy-go-lucky Sorcii Bonkikidienry.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs King Gelliar; Borgon the Restless, dwarven merc; Bellsie Bellewether, human wizard; Sorcii Bonkikidienry aasimar wild mage; Quartermaster Carter; Mayor MacFromm; Icabod Krafdorf, old grizzled trapper;
Setting Ilianvox, Gellian; Bellewether
Date 2/1/25-2/17/25
Quotes
  • "Burger druid." - Anonymous
  • "Animals get put down." - Kaiden
QP 3
Other Info n/a
Session 9 - Castle Shaddack: The Veteran [5.22.15]
The party passes through a S'lashka camp nicknamed "Early Grave". Then the party begins their assault on Castle Shaddack, moving into the barbican and clearing the east bailey. In the northeast tower, they slay one of the three bandit leaders, a slaver known only as "The Veteran". He had served in a unit that suffered great casualties at the Battle of Greenmaw, an incident Rheya feels partially responsible for.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Icabod Krafdorf, old grizzled trapper; The Veteran, Shaddack Bandit Leader
Setting Early Grave; Castle Shaddack
Date 2/18/25
Quotes
  • "I didn't mock you for staying in the back and casting spells." - Hallon to Rheya
  • P-T-S-Dickhole." - Myrtle
  • "Hallon enjoys being told what to do, so he can complain about being told what to do." - Kaiden
    "That's not inaccurate." - Hallon
QP 1
Other Info n/a
Session 10 - Castle Shaddack: Tharg Browncowl and Captain Ghrixy [5.29.15]
The party continues their assault on the bandit-slavers of Castle Shaddack, taking on the remaining two bandit leaders. Hallon is able to face off against the rogue Fist of Vengeance, Tharg Browncowl. Isocerus proceeeds to cut Tharg to ribbons but he retaliates with sword strikes of his own. Isocerus falls to the ground a bloody mess. An enraged Myrtle strikes down Tharg and then gives Isocerus a "kiss of life". Next the party assaults the chapel, quickly overwhelming Ghrixy and her minions with a rapid and well-coordinated assault. They collect their spoils and head back towards town to claim the reward, but are already making plans to clear the castle's dungeons of the underdark denizens whom the slavers had been doing business with.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Tharg Browncowl and Captain Ghrixy, bandit leaders
Setting Early Grave; Castle Shaddack
Date 2/19/25
Quotes
  • "You two should go be together. I'd watch." - Rheya, offering to keep watch
    "Eww." - Isocerus, not quite sure what Rheya has in mind
  • "Isocerus is annoying but that was innapropriate." - Kaiden(?)
QP 2
Other Info n/a
Session 11 - Castle Shaddack: Drinks and Delving [6.5.15]
The party resupplies in Bellewether and claims the reward for killing the bandit leaders. The party then enjoys a night of drinking in town, and finds the Bellsie Bellewether is starting to warm up to them. Late the next day, the party heads out and beings taking on the duergar-held portion of the castle.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Borgon the Restless, dwarven merc; Bellsie Bellewether, human wizard; Sorcii Bonkikidienry, aasimar wild mage
Setting Bellewether; Castle Shaddack
Date 2/20/25-2/22/15
Quotes
  • "You've been coddling fucking goats and everything along the way." - Kaiden chastising Rheya
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 12 - Castle Shaddack: Against the Duergar [6.19.15]
After recalling the tale of the Lord Shaddack the First, the party finished clearing the 1st floor of the castle, effectively ending the duergar presence. This included raiding the servant's kitchen, where they fought a duergar cook holding a deadman's switch linked to two cages with wild animals inside.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 2/22/25-2/23/25
Quotes
  • "It's not the size of the dwarf, it's...uh...the motion of...err...the greatsword." - Myrtle's not-so-snappy comeback
QP 0
Other Info Tapestries of Lord Shaddack the First:
  1. As a child he was accidentally dropped on a spike and died.
  2. A mystical potion ressurected him as a baby with a flawless physique.
  3. He won a painting contest and became famous for his paintings of unicorns.
  4. When war broke out, he became a propagandist whose unicorn art inspired men and women to fight for their side.
  5. Afterwards, he was made a lord and built Castle Shaddack. At the castle's groundbreaking, it is said that St. Taxil Necrobane had relations with a unicorn and from their passion the first goat was born.
Session 13 - Castle Shaddack: Steelhorn [6.26.15]
The party clears out the first basement level, first encountering and defeating cultists of a mysterious god named Kalathrex said to dwell below. Addtionally, they rid the floor of basilisks, rust monsters, and ceramic clockwork creatures. In a hiding place in the Master Smith's forge the party finds Steelhorn. This legendary sword once belonged to the first Lord Shaddack, and now it is Myrtle's to wield. They end up slaying the wereiguana, Iggy the Insane.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Iggy the Insane, wereiguana
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 2/24/25
Quotes n/a
QP 2?
Other Info n/a
Session 14 - Arrangements [7.3.15]
The party returns to Bellewether, where refugees are fleeing in from Cyan Gyantto where fighting between Gellian and the Pride will soon break out. Among the refugees are suicide bombers armed with Necklaces of Fireballs. The party thwarts a bomber outside the inn, but a second bomber destroys the town's armory. Also present in town are Archduke Chadborn and Armiger Larouch. They are going to assess the front lines for their respective kingdoms. Chadborn shocks the party by suggestion an arraigned marriage between Isocerus and Rheya to justify troop movements by the Chadborn house. Myrtle is especially incensed by this suggestion and goes off to get drunk, as she felt things were getting serious between her and Isocerus. The indecisive Isocerus is torn between his lust for Myrtle and his duty to his house.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Lord Octavius Chadborn, Archduke of Starsign; Armiger Larouch, Mothergreen Ambassador; Edgar Crudd, Lord Chadborn's manservant; Roger the Red, Captain of the Gellian guards accompanying the party
Setting Bellewether
Date 2/25/25-2/26/25
Quotes
  • "Even Red-skin McStupid over here?" - Hallon discussing Isocerus' potential as a suitor
  • "Marry me or fuck off." - Aksani's take on a Firebeard proposing
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 15 - Castle Shaddack: One Sauna, All Drama [7.10.15]
The party descends into the baths beneath Castle Shaddack. They do not get far, after fighting more devotees of the self-proclaimed god Kalathrex and wresting a magic sauna from a cyclops, Isocerus' wisy-washy nature crashes and burns his relationship with Myrtle, who storms out and heads back to town. The party attempts to smooth things over with mixed results.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Roger the Red, Captain of the Gellian guards accompanying the party; Glorp Two Eyes, cyclops with a monocle; Borgon the Restless, Myrtle's merc pal
Setting Castle Shaddack; Bellewether
Date 2/27/25-2/28/25
Quotes
  • "Borgon, take me away!" - Myrtle invokes Calgon
  • "Why are we giving this fuck up Isocerus love advice?" - Kaiden
    "Because we don't want Myrtle to leave the party." - Rheya
  • "I just don't know what 'love' is, I guess." - Isocerus
    "This is D&D?" - DM
  • "Isocerus, right at home in Porky's." - Cerberus7
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 16 - Castle Shaddack: The Sea Hag Incident [7.17.15]
Setting aside the lovers' spat, the party clears some more of Castle Shaddack's baths. Kaiden is almost done in after being isolated and drowning from being death gazed by a sea hag. He is almost ritually disemboweled before being saved by the others in the nick of time.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 3/1/25-3/2/15
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 17 - Castle Shaddack: Kuo-Toa Showdown [7.22.15]
The party ponders why Kaiden's eye, which was stabbed out by the sea hags, will not heal. Then, as the nervous peasants living inside Shaddack's outer walls try to ward off Torrasque Day, the party descends into caves beneath the castle and exterminate a tribe of murderous Kuo-Toa.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Roger the Red, guard captain
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 3/2/25-3/3/25
Quotes
  • "Burns can be sexy, right Rheya?" - Isocerus, who could probably benefit from sensitivity training
  • "Captain Bar-of-Soap." (as opposed to Captain Hammer) - DM
QP 3
Other Info n/a
Session 18 - Castle Shaddack: The Parlor of Lady Aranecris [7.31.15]
The party headed into the undercroft of Castle Shaddack and battled past ogre zombies and a beholder zombie. Then they faced off against Lady Aranecris, an ancient necromancer with the upper body of a mummified woman and the lower body of a massive spider. She struck with a combination of direct attacks, poisonous spiders, and a breath weapon composed of of full-sized gators. The party was brutalized and demoralized by her relentless assault, but Kaiden's unassailable defenses and constant attacks from the rest of the heroes finally won the day.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Lady Aranecris
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 3/4/25-3/6/25
Quotes
  • "This drink tastes like chapped lips." - Shyninja described the vomitous concoction of Starburst jellybeans somewhat dissolved in cherry vodka.
  • "Our party's name is Truth or Dare or Snakes." - Aksani
QP 3 (level 5 reached)
Other Info n/a
Session 19 - Castle Shaddack: Kalathrex [8.1.15, 8.7.15]
Having acquired the Sending spell, Rheya begins checking in with various contacts. From the front lines, she learns that the Pride defeated the Torrasque on Torrasque day and that allied troops appear to be badly outmatched. Archduke Chadborn will likely send reinforcements whether Rheya and Isocerus get engaged or not. Secondly, Filvendor Everleaf and Little Leaf still hold the northern Whispderdawn city of Inmahge. Lastly, Byron Runestar reports that a smuggler delivered both the vial to Hermia the Fey Witch and something mysterious to the cult leader Kalathrex. The party heads back into the lowest levels of Castle Shaddack. They encounter the tattooed orc they first fought at the vineyard and slay him; he was guarding a number of slave prisoners which joined the growing community staying at the castle. Then they struck down Kalathrex, who turned out to be a mind flayer. He was using a strange giant tongue to grant his followers spells.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 3/7/25-3/8/15
Quotes n/a
QP 3
Other Info n/a
Session 20 - The PGLF, the Circus of Fiends, and Bearlial [8.14.15]
After being irritated by Peoples' Goat Liberation Front activists, the party investigates Kaiden's vision of a neglected shrine of Valos and a nearly fiendish Circus. The party slays the three evil circus members, and rescues a celestial warbear named Bearlial who becomes Kaiden's bonded mount. The day takes a strange turn when the party attends an all-male review put on by Magical Mike and the Wands of Wonder. The exotic dancing is underway when a terrible symphony of flatulence overshadows the performers.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Magical Mike, exotic dancer; Roger the Red, guard captain
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 3/9/25-3/10/15
Quotes
  • "Why don't you raise the wolves?" - Isocerus, ever the oblivious rich kid, suggests a farmer raise the wolves that wiped out his goat herd.
  • "Did I hear dick? Who said dick?" - Myrtle has a gift
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 21 - The City of Ass [8.21.15]
A disgruntled mage, Rheea the Dire, is found to be behind the mysterious farts. She called in a favor from a self-styled Sultan, a djinn named He Who Dealt It. The party must go through a rift to a particularly smelly mote in the Elemental Plane of Air. He Who Dealt It was a "fart connoisseur" and was more misguided that malicious. The party did some sleuthing and found out the djinni was ego driven and a sucker for flattery. So, the party loaded up on beans, broccoli, and booze and formally requested an audience with the djinn. Convinced that they were fellow fart enthusiasts, the djinn eventually agreed to relocate the prime-side of the portal to Rheea's butthole. Then the party went to Poopa Hookah with He who dealt it and sampled flatulence-infused tobaccos. The proprietor, Nevertrust, lamented they had never obtained a gelatinous cube's fart. Myrtle's expert "fart curtsy" impressed the djinn so much that he gifted her a single-use crystal that she could use to summon his aid sometime in the future. Once the party was back on the prime, they got cleaned up and attended a successful performance by Magical Mike and the Wands of Wonder. After the show, Myrtle bedded a few of the dancers.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Magical Mike, exotic dancer; Roger the Red, guard captain; Rheea the Dire, Air Genasi Mage whose butthole is now a planar portal; Queyf, aarakocra general store owner; Nevertrust, shart mephit hookah lounge proprietor; The Excremental, Palace Guard; He Who Dealt It, Fart Djinn
Setting Castle Shaddack; City of Ass, Plane of Air
Date 3/10/25-3/11/25
Quotes
  • "I'm going to fart-curtsy." - Myrtle, who then rolled a natural 20
  • "Do I have advantage on my fart?" - Tonsilrock
  • "Modron farts are very subtle." - He Who Dealt It
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 22 - Castle Shaddack: Deathcrest [8.28.15]
Mad Mage Rod Stafforwand appears on the castle steps with a crew of kobolds and begins demanding tribute from the refugees. The party step in and dispatches Stafforwand as well as a kobold ratmaster. The party finds a gelatinous cube and summons He Who Dealt It so he can claim it. Then they take on the terror of the upper floors, a young black dragon named Deathcrest the Indomitable. A series of well-placed stunning strikes from Hallon allow the party to make short work of Deathcrest. The party ponders renaming the castle Deathcrest to commemorate the victory.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Rod Stafforwand, the Mad Mage; Ratmaster Backfeifengesicht, kobold ratmaster; He Who Dealt It, fart djinn; Larry the Kobold Jester, as "King Kobold"; Deathcrest the Indomitable, young black dragon
Setting Castle Shaddack
Date 3/12/25
Quotes
  • "Peasants may joke about kobolds, but none dare jest about kobold ratmasters lest one show up." - DM
  • "Silence the dwarf woman! Freedom bad! Confusing us with words!" - panicked kobolds
QP 3
Other Info n/a

Arc 3: The Missing Researcher

Session 23 - Airship Attack [9.4.15]
The party boards an airship headed from Castle Deathcrest for the captial of Gellian, Illianvox. They briefly meet Captain Timecop, a agent of Taxil pursuing Mr. Cinnamon Buns for child support. However, Captain Timecop creates a paradox and winks out of existence. The party also meets Mr. Hogan and a group of dwarven orphan burn victims in his care. Myrtle briefly adopts a young mute orphans she renames Biff. The airship is attacked by a triceratops and a fire elemental in a diversion to allow Mr. Hogan to seize control of the spelljamming helm. It is revealed that he is an oni that has killed and taken the place of the real Mr. Hogan. The party defeats the oni and prevents a catastrophic crash of the airship in Illianvox. Safely in the capital, they make plans for Kaiden's knighting ceremony and to track down a missing researcher named Pompom Whimsytree.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Roger the Red, head of operations at Castle Deathcrest; Captain Khan, airship captain; an oni disguised as Mr. Hogan; Captain Timecop, time cop; Magical Mike, exotic dance troop leader; Mr. Cinnamon Buns, exotic dancer; Brasgrar "Biff" Wyvernjaw, mute but "least cripsy" dwarf orphan burn victim; King Gelliar of Gellian
Setting Castle Deathcrest; Illianvox, Gellian
Date 3/12/25-3/14/25
Quotes
  • "I kiss him on his crispy forehead." - Myrtle
QP 1
Other Info n/a
Session 24 - The Changing House [9.25.15]
Isocerus, Rheya, and Hallon head to the Phillipian Estate to gather up loved ones for Kaiden's upcoming knighting ceremony. The enter a bizarre home called the "Changing House" to rescue Hilda and two other teens. The hosue was said to be a "prototype" made by an "unsung wizard hero" dropped off by Sir Phillip after the Quan'thosk'alys Wars. Inside the three heroes slew a couch and a dozen flying sex snakes, all while navigating a confusing series of rooms while avoiding being eaten by a duck.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Ma and Pa Kirkwood, Kaiden's parents; Hilda, Kaiden's old flame; Todd and Joanie, promiscuous teenagers
Setting Phillipian Estate, Gellian
Date 3/15/25-3/16/25
Quotes
  • "I'm tackling the sword." - Hallon
  • "I don't having Int.Oh wait, yeah." - Tonsilrock loses track of a core stat.
  • "Your rope leads back into the open mouth of a gargantuan duck lying on the ground. It has piled leaves on itself in a poor attempt to hide." - DM
  • "I've only got eyes for Kaiden's dick." - Hilda rebuffs Isocerus.
  • "Todd House Blend!" - Anonymous
QP 0
Other Info List of rooms: sitting room, duck room, pool with chandelier, coffee shop, kitchen, pantry, cathedral, dog kennel with a slide, Arcadia's study
Session 25 - The Warden of the Road [10.9.15]
The party is joined by sorceress Sorcii Bonkikidienry, an ally from Bellewether whom happens to be a colleague of Pompom Whimsytree. Kaiden, now knighted, stays behind to under formal induction into his knightly order. To work their way to the town where Pompom was last seen, the party sets out west on the Great Caravan Way towards Cantrylia. The seasoned adventurers scare themselves with ghost stories until they are literally hallucinating. Isocerus also reveals the ability to shed his tail and grow a new one from a nub. Back on the road, Myrtle is unsuccessful in romancing a stranger with an unsettling demeanor. Later, the stranger strikes out at the party and is revealed to be an oni that preys on travelers, the self-styled "Warden of the Road." After nearly losing Hallon to the oni mind games, the party dispatches the oni and moves on.
DM Aksani
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs King Gelliar of Gellian; The Warden of the Road, murderous oni
Setting Illianvox, Gellian
Date 3/17/25-4/11/25
Quotes
  • "Isocerus, if you want to rub it in?" - DM
    "Rub my nub in something?" - Isocerus
  • "He's really tall, he wore a cloak, and obviously has no sexual appetite." - Myrtle
  • "It's time to turn this butterface into a betterface!" - Isocerus
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 26 - The Salty Beast [10.23.15]
The party discovered a ransacked caravan along the road and a group of gnolls still at work looting. The party dispatches the gnolls and heads to a nearby salt mining town. The only inn, the Salty Beast, is run by a racist, classist, irrational old woman intent of driving away most customers. She is largely indifferent to the death of her sons in the caravan attack. After discovering the she also runs the general goods store, the party simply leaves town and camps on the road before heading on to Cantrylia.
DM Aksani
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting The Salty Beast, Rey; Cantrylia, Rey
Date 4/11/25-4/21/25
Quotes
  • "I'm going to drop back Matrix-style!" - Cerberus7, who then begins coughing and drops everything.
  • "Im the sword guy in the movie Harrison Ford. - Tonsilrock
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 27 - The Chadborn Estate [11.6.15]
Heading towards Lake Wailele, the heroes encounter reports that Pol-Suni has been sealed off due to a plague. The party arrives in Starsign at the Chadborn Estate. Isocerus is surprised to learn that his brother, Tave, is away on secret business. The party butts heads with Isocerus' unkind stepmother and Rheya later gives a rude performance in return. Next the party heads into town where they meet with Jack, a bartender friend of Isocerus. They also head to the dress shop "Never Too Many Dresses" and place some orders with the apprentice, Israel St. John. They then head downriver on a family yacht into Mothergreen. Arriving in the port city of Broham, they meet with Sir Arnim Belle, the last person to see Pompom.
DM Aksani
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Lady Geneva Chadborn, Isocerus' stepmother; Jack, bartender; Israel St. John, dress shop apprentice; Sir Arnim Belle, warrior and retired adventurer
Setting Starsign, Rey; Broham, Mothergreen
Date 4/22/25-4/28/25
Quotes
  • "I beat to my own drumer." - Isocerus
  • "AIDS. AIDS. AIDS. Fingers crossed." - Anonymous
  • "I like butt stuff as well. Come on in, the dresses are just fine." - Israel St. John
  • "It's a wet butt contest!" - Myrtle
  • "I know where all the parts go." - Myrtle
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 28 - Inquiries in Broham [11.13.15]
On Sir Arnim Belle's advice, the party inquires with the shopkeeper at an oddities shop named "The Belfry". They also hit a number local bars, introducing them to popular potent narcotic named Jungle Spice, pushy Mothergreen soldiers about to head for the front line, and psychotic toilet hooker families. In becomes clear that Broham is tightly in the grip of the Crow's Eye Cartel, current enemies of Pompom and controllers of the Jungle Spice market. The party is warned in a note that the shopkeeper from the Belfry has been taken by the cartel. The cartel demands a meeting on their terms.
DM Aksani
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Sir Arnim Belle, warrior and retired adventurer
Setting Broham, Mothergreen
Date 4/28/25-5/1/25
Quotes

n/a

QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 29 - Pompom's Grand Entrance [11.20.15]
The party investigates a number of dead-end leads trying to get a step ahead of the cartel. Left with little options due to the cartel's superior manpower and intel, Rheya ends up walking into a cartel trap. They reveal their true intention was to kidnap and ransom her. Fortunately, Pompom and his ranger pal Griff burst in and decimate the cartel forces present and rescue Rheya. There is bad news, however. Isocerus has been kidnapped due to cartel ambush outside of the city. With Pompom's insight, the party begins an assault on the cartel's stronghold built into the seacliffs north of the city.
DM Aksani
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Sir Arnim Belle, warrior and retired adventurer; Pompom Whimsytree, selfish and eccentric genius wizard; Griff, Pompom's ranger pal
Setting Broham, Mothergreen; Crow's Eye Stronghold, Mothergreen
Date 5/1/25-5/2/25
Quotes

n/a

QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 30 - The Crow's Eye Cartel [12.4.15]
The party splits up. Rheya springs the shopkeeper from a cell while the other party members rescue Isocerus from Ilsa, She-Wolf of the Crow's Eye. She was intending to torture Isocerus to extract information, but he is so willing to sell out his closest friends that the interrogation is effortless. Among Isocerus' blunders is stating that he "Dodged that bullet." in reference to past relationships while Myrtle was invisible and present in the room.The party slays Ilsa and escapes (with Isocerus nearly dying in the process). They return to Starsign with Pompom, and Rheya and Pompom begin a week of dangerous experiments to analyze the nature of Hermia's vial and Kalathrex's spell-granting tongue.
DM Aksani
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Pompom Whimsytree, selfish and eccentric genius wizard; Griff, Pompom's ranger pal; Ilsa, She-Wolf of the Crow's Eye
Setting Crow's Eye Stronghold, Mothergreen; Broham, Mothergreen; Starsign, Rey
Date 5/2/25-5/8/25
Quotes

n/a

QP 9
Other Info n/a

Arc 4: Chronomantic Crisis in Pol-suni

Session 31 - Colonel Steele [12.11.15]
While Rheya and Pompom do research, the other party members meet up with Kaiden and Captain Timecop. The very indirect Captain Timecop entrusts Myrtle with a clock-faced medallion he claimed to gave gotten from the party one month ago. The party meets with the Starsign Garrison leader, Captain Winston. He has been stymied in getting information about the reported plague in Pol-suni to the south. A special forces commander from the capital, Colonel Steele, is not responding to his inquiries to her. Using Isocerus' noble standing to exert authority, the party takes a team of five Rey solders and heads south to investigate. They also dabble with magical effects of Hallon's unpredictable fermented "best spice", Verisheen. After tense and suspicious meetings with Steele and her mage researchers, Isocerus calls out Steele as a liar. Steele insists that she is under higher orders to deceive the heroes. Sorcii quickly asserts that the party is meant to be there, particularly if the true nature of the so-called plague is chronomantic in nature. A shocked Steele says she will ask her superiors how to proceed.
DM Valeria
PCs Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Captain Timecop, time cop; Captain Winston, guard captain in Starsign; Colonel Natalia Steele, quarantine perimeter leader outside of Pol-Suni; Anthony, human Rey guard; Autumnleaf, elven Rey guard; Timber, elven Rey guard; Dalarandy, human Rey guard; Porchini, Goliath Rey guard
Setting Starsign, Rey; Steele's Camp, Rey
Date 5/8/25-5/11/25
Quotes

n/a

QP 0
Other Info Horses: Rainfire (Sorcii), Windstorm (Hallon), Stardust (Isocerus), Buttacup (Myrtle)
Session 32 - Now, One Month Ago [12.18.15]
The party has another evening of hijinks with Hallon's Verisheen. The next morning, Steele grants permission for the party to enter the time-frozen city of Pol-Suni. They bring Porchini and Anthony with them. A month ago, a temporal experiment (carried out by a team led by Professor Weisenheimer from the city's mage academy) went wrong. They party enters the city and finds themselves thrown back in time one month, with the people in town cut off from the outside world. The party is looking for the city's leader, Archduke Rusti Morgan. They meet up with his daughter (and old crush of Isocerus'), Clara, and began to track down the Archduke and the professor. They begin a dangerous foray into a secret underground lab, but around sunset are thrown back in time one day, forced to repeat the day's events again.
DM Valeria
PCs Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Colonel Natalia Steele, quarantine perimeter leader outside of Pol-Suni; Anthony, human Rey guard; Porchini, Goliath Rey guard; Earlessa Clara Morgan, daughter of Archduke Rusti Morgan; Professor Zhara, Weisenheimer's colleague
Setting Steele's Camp, Rey; Pol-Suni, Rey
Date 5/12/25, then outside of normal time
Quotes
  • "Uncanny dick dodge." - Anonymous
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 33 - Yesternow, Thisterday [1.8.16]
Looping the same day over and over, most of the party explores their baser natures. Sorcii, Myrtle and Hallon spend a day (or two) in unbridled bacchanalian revelry. Hallon also takes a day to experiment with mass use of Verisheen, resulting in widespread combustion and unintended death. Isocerus gambles without risk and perfects having instant chemistry with Clara, leading to afternoons of intimacy. Kaiden resolves to not have any fun. Finally, Sorcii and Kaiden get down to the real work of enlisting Professor Zhara at the Pol-suni Academy and hunting down Archduke Morgan's contacts. Plus the party dies to a pretrification trap, a lot.
DM Valeria
PCs Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Anthony, human Rey guard; Porchini, Goliath Rey guard; Earlessa Clara Morgan, daughter of Archduke Rusti Morgan; Professor Zhara, Weisenheimer's colleague; Emberflame, Pol-suni Academy head invoker; Sonya, bartender friend of the Archduke; Felicia, monster slayer/bouncer
Setting Pol-Suni, Rey
Date Outside of normal time
Quotes
  • "Yesternow." - Hallon
  • "Thisterday," - Kaiden
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 34 - Everyday is Neverday [1.15.16]
Still looping the same day over and over, the party gets the day down to a science. They raid Weisenheimer's secret lab and defeat the Taxil Monster that was causing the experiment to go awry. They then meet up with Captain Timecop and return the time medallion. After hanging out in Pol-Suni for a month, they return to normal time. Isocerus declares his intention to court Clara.
DM Valeria
PCs Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Anthony, human Rey guard; Porchini, Goliath Rey guard; Earlessa Clara Morgan, daughter of Archduke Rusti Morgan; Professor Zhara, Weisenheimer's colleague; Emberflame, Pol-suni Academy head invoker; Sonya, bartender friend of the Archduke; Felicia, monster slayer/bouncer; Shuzzle "Rainbow Grandpa" Tinklewang, frazzled gnome enchanter; Archduke Rusti Morgan; Professor Weisenheimer, Pol-suni Academy chronomancer; Captain Timecop, time cop
Setting Pol-Suni, Rey
Date Outside of normal time, 5/12/25
Quotes
  • "Show them your boobs, Myrtle!" - multiple PCs, asking Myrtle to display the time medallion
    "Okay!" - Myrtle, who flashes her breasts instead
  • "Anything weird about his stick?" - Isocerus
    "Bump on the end was swollen." - Hallon
  • "1d100. How bi is your elf?" - Anonymous
  • "Did you pull out?" - Sorcii
    "No! Tomorrow doesn't count." - Isoscerus
  • "Dwarven boob musk." - Anonymous
QP 3
Other Info n/a

Arc 5: Voyages of the Flying Sex Snake

Session 35 - Long Live the Queen [1.22.16]
The party returns to Gellian with knowledge from Pompom that the "parts" they've been finding are from a higher order upper planes being, perhaps a god. The passing of the the elderly King Gelliar places his teenage daughter Ilianva on the throne. News from the front lines with the Pride is grim. Cyan Gyantto has fallen, Lord Action is missing, and Sir Frederick is in something akin to a "magical coma." The Pride are using "god parts" as well. The party follows a lead on the "god part" suppliers, but the targets escape before the party breaches the suppliers' safehouse.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Queen Ilianva of Gellian; Roger the Red, Deathcrest guard captain; Borgon the Restless, Gruffmarble merc
Setting Ilianvox, Gellian
Date 5/19/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 36 - The Flying Sex Snake [2.5.16]
The party raids a safehouse in Pinkerton, and discovers Isocerus' brother, Tave Chadborn, running a middleman operation distributing the god parts. Tave however is ignorant of the true supplier, necessitating the party tracking down Tave's deliverymen. Disgusted with Tave's secret operation, Archduke Octavius Chadborn names Isocerus as his new heir, the Earl of Starsign. The Archduke also warns that Isocerus' mother might be involved somehow. Mothergreen provides an airship, on the condition that a Mothergreen native be a figurehead expedition leader. Sir Arnim Belle is agreeable to the task. The party christens the airship The Flying Sex Snake and outfits and crew with many companions from past adventures.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Tave Chadborn, Isocerus' brother; Archduke Octavius Chadborn, Isocerus' father
Setting Ilianvox, Gellian; Pinkerton, Gellian
Date 5/20/25-6/6/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info Crew Roster
Session 37 - The Taint: Arrival [2.12.16]
The heroes head out tracking "god part" trafficker Yunter Boot-on-Neck, and arrive in a city of naked evil -- the jewel of the Delphinium Coalition -- The Taint. The party witnesses the city's formidable national guard, open slave trade, and debauched populace. The spend the night at the Blaggard's Respite.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting The Taint
Date 6/14/25-6/15/25
Quotes
  • "No dirty used slave holes for us." - Corran
  • "I'm drunk as shit and I want to touch your dick." - some drow that is not a pickpocket
  • "Just so you know I could." - a kinda rapey Myrtle to Kaiden
QP 0
Other Info Undercover names: Rheya as Victoria "Tory" Soulripper; Hallon as Corran Swiftfist; Isocerus as "Bikie Wars" Damakos; Myrtle as Betsy Ross; Kaiden as Dirk Badguy
Session 38 - The Taint: Preparing to March [2.19.16]
The party ends of getting separate rooms due to simmering tension and distrust among party members. The next day, the party continues to investigate the city. They purchase two runaway slave who otherwise would have been sacrificed to Sadie. The pair are returned to the ship, and freed. Next the disguised heroes acquire a Musketeer of Mellek guide and prepare to enter Sadie's Slit in pursuit of Yunter Boot-on-Neck.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Kindra "Worm" Kendrix, half-elf freed slave; Jaren "Pustule" Youngsmith, human freed slave; Johann McMozart, Musketeers of Mellek leader in the Taint; Corrine d'Artagnan, Musketeer of Mellek hired as a guide to Sadie's Slit
Setting The Taint
Date 6/15/25-6/26/25
Quotes "Fangdexterous" - neobolts
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 39-40 - The Taint: Sadie's Slit [2.26.16, 3.4.16]
The party journeys into the pure chaos of Sadie's Slit, a long canyon north of the city criss-crossed with caves. Groups and creatures too uncivilized to live in the Taint end up here. The party encounters Quan'thosk'alys cultists trying to recreate a 1990s Earth office full of cubicles in hopes of pleasing Cthulhu with a depiction of his homeworld. They destroy a crazy golems that vaccuums poop from the butts of unlucky passers-by. They surprisingly then simply converse with Yunter Boot-on-Neck upon finding him in the lair of the troll that created the golem. Yunter reveals that his partner, Xizix, went to Gloecoast to secure passage on a ship. Upon returning to the Taint to depart, the party discovers Krongus the Younger has (on Korgash's authority) hired the Musketeers of Mellek to fight against the pride, and the mercs are mobilizing en masse.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Corrine d'Artagnan, Musketeer of Mellek hired as a guide to Sadie's Slit; Krongus the Younger, Crosiarx Representative
Setting Sadie's Slit; The Taint
Date 6/27/25-6/28/25
Quotes n/a
QP  ?
Other Info n/a
Session 41-42 - The Red Hand Pirates [3.25.16, 4.1.16]
At sea, the party comes across a House Tealgoblet ship under attacks from three pirate ships. The pirates are remnants of the Red Hand Navy from the War of the Shards five years prior. The party defeats the pirates and their leader, a dragon named Mianth. They also recruit an ettin named Bernie (Bert + Ernie).
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Captain Quofire Peppermill, Jahoel of Tealgoblet merchant; Bernie the Ettin; Mianth, Red Hand Pirate Leader
Setting The Ringed Sea
Date 7/1/25-7/14/25
Quotes
  • "But I drew a moon..." - Anoymous
  • "If they're knocked up, I'm gonna knock 'em down." - Myrtle, on fighting pregnant monsters
  • "Hit points begin at conception." - DM
  • "My fingers stayed in my legs." - Isocerus, not making any sense at all
  • "I understand, I just don't care." - Tonsilrock on the state of strategic play in D&D
QP  ?
Other Info n/a
Session 43 - Two Scoops [4.8.16]
The party arrives in Gloecoast, where the three dwarven nations are holding a great dwarf moot. The party stops by the bar Dwarves on a Wharf where Myrtle worked. Her boss had been forced to fire her after she bounced an unruly royal advisor named Drek McShrekington. The party is intrigued by her mysterious bar nickname, "Two Scoops." They track the githyanki knight Xizix to the port, where he appears to have booked passage on one of a number of pearl ships owned by another royal advisor, Graz Seaforge. The location of the pearl beds is closely guarded, so while some party members forge relationships with local pearl jewelry sellers, Myrtle looks into her heritage and claims the right of kertilsveinr, a torchbearer in the King of Perelix's personal regiment. To do so, she challenges and defeats the guard captain, Jaegen Sunglaive, who is quite taken with her. After the dwarves only feast, Myrtle takes the other pary members as guests to the Queen's royal ball.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Renda Wolfsbane of Thozan, Queen of the Hillholds; Rathax Ogreslayer of Perelix, King of the Mountain Halls; Honorix of Barsiege, Priest-King of the Summit Keeps; Rensis Hammerdown, proprietor of Dwarves on a Wharf; Drek McShrkington, handsy royal advisor; Guildmaster Gruffmarble; Ellswynn Thundersunder, pearl broker; Maester Oldweather, Thozan Keeper of Records; Jaegan Sunglaive, head of King Ogreslayer's personal guard
Setting Gloecoast, Thozan, Dwarven Alliance
Date 7/15/25
Quotes n/a
QP  ?
Other Info n/a
Session 44 - The Dwarven Ball [4.15.16]
Inside the ball, the party springs into action. First Rheya takes a tour of the royal grounds and scopes out the location of Graz's residence. Then, while Myrtle distracts Jaegen with some frisky fun, Hallon and Isocerus break into Graz's house and steal the destination coordinates of the pearl ship with Xizix on it.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Renda Wolfsbane of Thozan, Queen of the Hillholds; Rathax Ogreslayer of Perelix, King of the Mountain Halls; Honorix of Barsiege, Priest-King of the Summit Keeps; Drek McShrkington, handsy royal advisor; Graz Seaforge; royal advisor and pearl merchant; Maester Oldweather, Thozan Keeper of Records; Jaegan Sunglaive, head of King Ogreslayer's personal guard
Setting Gloecoast, Thozan, Dwarven Alliance
Date 7/16/25
Quotes n/a
QP  ?
Other Info n/a
Session 45 - Bloodpearl Island [4.29.16]
The party discovers at the coordinates Bloodpearl Island, as raising and lowering island with a keep where merfolk slaves harvest pearls for sahuagin Pride members who then trade them with Graz for dwarven weapons. While battling sahuagin on the island, a mysterious telepathic voice tries unsuccessfully to convince Kaiden and Hallon to betray the party.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Xizix, githyanki god part seller
Setting Bloodpearl Island, the Great Ocean
Date 8/20/25
Quotes
  • "You got 400 rounds before this biscuit goes off." - DM, on the tainted biscuit Myrtle shoved up a sahuagin priestess' ass mid-fight
  • "We'll burn that bridge when we get there." - Myrtle
    That's not the saying." - DM
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 46 - Maka-la [5.13.16]
The party defeats the Pride leadership at Bloodpearl Island: the githyanki Xizix, the sahuagin dhampir Baron Everteeth, and the aboleth known as the Master who was behind the telepathic voice. Following Kaiden's prophetic eye, the party discovers, Maka-la, a secret avariel utopia of small floating islands built in a supernatural void in the ocean. There the Priest of Valos, Haldreithen Aetherwalk, reveals that Kaiden is the new champion of Valos. He also reveals that under similar circumstances during the Year of the Comet, Queen Forlestia of Ergasia and Boozer the Warpony sealed the power of the dead god Zalenkas behind crystal gates using the Elven Crown of Ascension. The party, having gained access to teleport circle magic, returns to the Southlands ahead of their ship. In conversation, Kaiden jokes about seducing the xenophobic elven queen, leading to Rheya becoming quite flustered and the party correctly deducing that she is the queen's love child by Lord Action.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Xizix, githyanki god part seller; Baron Everteeth, sahuagin dhampir Pride cultist; The Master, aboleth lord of Bloodpearl Island; Haldreithen Aetherwalk, Maka-la avariel priest of Valos
Setting Bloodpearl Island, the Great Ocean; Maka-la, the Great Ocean
Date 8/20/25-8/21/25
Quotes
  • "Maybe I'm the elven queen's type." - Kaiden
    "Errr, no...." - Rheya
    "Actually..." - DM
QP 5
Other Info n/a

Arc 6: The Verdandi Isles

Session 47 - Verdandi Isles: Diggle's Point [5.27.16]
Pompom informs the party that some god parts are resonating with something on a remote island chain to the south of the Southlands. The party takes an airship there, and discovers the island has been filling with refugees from the Southlands fleeing the war. In Diggle's Point, they relax at a very accommodating brothel, Merilee's House of Rest, while getting a better understanding of the islands and their inhabitants.
DM Cerberus7
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Pompom Whimsytree, eccentric genius gnomish wizard
Setting Pompom's Lab, Castle Deathcrest, Gellian, Southlands; Verdandi Isles, Great Sea
Date 8/22/25-8/24/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 48 - Verdandi Isles: Abandoned Mine [6.3.16]
The party heads to Digg's abandoned mine to investigate. On the way they find mysterous tunnels in the ground of a nearby farm where livestock have been going missing. The tunnel leads them into the mine, where they do battle with earth elementals and undead.
DM Cerberus7
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (guest run by Aksani)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Verdandi Isles, Great Sea
Date 8/24/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 49 - Verdandi Isles: The Plight of Lu'un [7.22.16]
The party continued to clear out the tunnels, encountering a visage of the quasi-god Lu'un, the guardian spirit of the Verdandi Isles. But the spirit seems corrupted somehow by an evil influence and the party is wary. They meet with a preistess of Lu'un and see in a vision, parts of Lu'un scattered across the isles.
DM Cerberus7
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs O'sha Tallowmere, Lu'un preistess
Setting Verdandi Isles, Great Sea
Date 8/24/25-8/25/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 50 - Verdandi Isles: Pirate Island [8.11.16]
The party strikes out at pirate island, and on the way they meet Morluun, a "fin", one of a multitude of colorful fishmen creatures that inhabit the area and have been coerced into helping gather Lu'un parts. The party shows up, disrupting the pirates and Pride members operating the island. With the help of an animated stronghold gate and a horn's worth of vikings, the party recovered another Lu'un part from a pirate leader.
DM Cerberus7
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Morluun, helpful fin
Setting Verdandi Isles, Great Sea
Date 8/26/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 51-52 - Verdandi Isles: Eastern Island Assault [9.2.16, 9.9.16]
The party takes control of a ship and sets sail for the remaining two islands where parts of Lu'un are present. They fight an ichor corrupted shark in open waters. They discover that remnants of ichor are present in the area, and that the fins eat ichor as sustenance. With the help of the fins, the party assaults an island and takes back another Lu'un part.
DM Cerberus7
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Verdandi Isles, Great Sea
Date 8/27/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 53 - Verdandi Isles: Lu'un Redeemed [9.23.16]
The party heads back to Diggle's Point to rest and plan the attack on the final island, where the largest concentration of Lu'un parts is located. The party attacks via an underwater tunnel, and after a long battle the final parts of Lu'un are recoverd, restoring peace to the Verdandi Isles. The party heads back to Castle Deathcrest, where Pompom and Hallon have been refining Verisheen. The parts of Lu'un will give Pompom and comparative sample to further his god part research.
DM Cerberus7
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Sorcii Bonkikidienry (neobolts), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs n/a
Setting Verdandi Isles, Great Sea
Date 8/27/25-9/1/25
Quotes n/a
QP (The party obtained level 10.)
Other Info n/a

Arc 7: Showdown with the Pride

Session 54 - The Crown of Ascension [10.7.16]
The party reunites with the crew of the Flying Sex Snake and learns there is a spy on board. They sneak into the palace of the high elves in Effress, in a bid to meet secretly with Queen Forlestia, Rheya's estranged mother. What they find is that Forlestia died in a tragic fall a year ago, and the Crown of Ascension did not accept her sister Bascieliya as the new queen. So for the past year, Forlestia's death has been kept secret. Also, during that time, the glass doors that seal the Tomb of Zalenkas have failed, but without a rightful crown-bearer, the location of the tomb is lost. The tomb's architect, Boozer the Nightmare Lord is missing as well. The Crown of Ascension will accept Rheya, and the party heads to the tomb, located in the underdark beneath Castle Deathcrest.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Llandoweer Strongpine, leader of Oakhope; Father Goldenpoplar, head priest of Aurora in Efress; Princess Bascieliya, Rheya's aunt; Kolgannin Flamarrow, head of the Ergasian Queensguard; Aerlya, priestess of Oshejra and advisor to Princess Bascieliya
Setting Castle Deathcrest, Gellian; Oakhope, Runestar League; Effress, Ergasia
Date 9/2/25-9/3/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 55 - The Tomb of Zalenkas [10.14.16]
Rheya leaves the status quo untouched in Ergasia, even thought she is the rightful queen. The party rejoins Flying Sex Snake and uses Zone of Truth to out Cealy Cogsmith as a triple agent for Zindar, the Runestar Foundation, and the Pride. The revelation of the Runestar Foundation's existance causes Kaiden to mistrust Rheya. Upon questioning Zindar supporter Rarn Starbite, the party learns Zindar's order has their own mysterious agenda in opposing the Pride. The party then takes on the puzzles of the Tomb of Zalenkas, meets a watchful deva named the Guardian, and rescues Boozer from where he was trapped in the sarcophagus room. They face down and defeat the spirit of Skullord, the last champion of Zalenkas. Boozer teaches Rheya the spell Godspark Eulogy before departing to investigate why the glass doors failed in the first place. Now the party needs the name of the god whose parts the Pride has and they can neutralize them. The leaders of various anti-Pride forces begin to gather at Castle Deathcrest for a counter-offensive against the Pride.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Queen Ilianva of Gellian; Skullord, the last champion of Zalenkas; Boozer, the Nightmare Lord
Setting Castle Deathcrest, Gellian
Date 9/3/25-9/6/25
Quotes n/a
QP (The party obtained level 11.)
Other Info n/a
Session 56 - War of the Pride: Counter-Offensive [10.19.16]
Having the means to shut down the god parts, the party gathers the forces of various nations at a summit at Castle Deathcrest to combat the Pride. Zindar reveals that the god parts belonged to the Ageless One. The party defeats the Pride forces at Bellewether and Pale Gyantto, including the High Priestess and Champion of the Golden Lioness.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Korgash the Third, Warchief of Crosiarx; Johann McMozart, Musketeers of Mellek Taint Branch Leader; Krongus the Younger, Crosiarx Ambassador and Warband Leader; Queen Ilianva of Gellian; Roger the Red, Guard Captain of Castle Shaddack; Sir Arnim Belle; Knight of Mothergreen; Armiger Larouch; Queen's Hand of Mothergreen; Rathax Ogreslayer of Perelix, King of the Mountain Halls; Jaegan Sunglaive, Head of the Perelix Royal Guard; Lord Octavius Chadborn, Archduke of Starsign; Lady Clara Morgan, Earlessa of Pol-suni; Colonel Natalia Steele, Rey Special Forces Commander; Byron Runestar, Runestar League Ambassador; Llandoweer Strongpine, Leader of Oakhope; Mister Zindar, Champion of Karactas; Velvetrix, Right Hand of Zindar and Isocerus' Mother; Little Leaf, Resistance Operative; Filvendor Everleaf, Leader of Inmahge; Corporal Booklearnin', SQUADRON Brigade Tactician; Thund Wyvernjaw, follower of Myrtle; Grinnd Wyvernjaw, follower of Myrtle; Borgon the Restless, follower of Myrtle; MAyor McFromm of Bellewether; Nurple Kettlepipe, Pride Vanguard General; Brother Stone, Golden Lioness Archbishop of Ryhan; Bitterroot, High Priestess of the Golden Lioness; Crowe the Chosen, Champion of the Golden Lioness
Setting Castle Deathcrest, Gellian; Bellewether; Pale Gyantto, Mothergreen
Date 9/7/25-9/9/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a
Session 57 - War of the Pride: Final Showdown [10.23.16]
The party takes on the remaning Pride leadership at a keep on the eastern edge of the Phillipian Estate, including Kormar the Deathshaper, Big Branch, and Lord Dinosaur. During the fight Roger the Red is killed. Disabling the last god part bring Lord Action and Sir Frederick out of their magical comas. The Pride is shattered and peace is restored to the land.
DM neobolts
PCs Rheya Action (Valeria), Hallon Galonodel (Cerberus7), Myrtle Firebeard (Shyninja), Kaiden Kirkwood (Aksani), Isocerus Chadborn (Tonsilrock)
Major NPCs Krongus the Younger, Crosiarx Ambassador and Warband Leader; Roger the Red, Guard Captain of Castle Shaddack; Thund Wyvernjaw, follower of Myrtle; Grinnd Wyvernjaw, follower of Myrtle; Borgon the Restless, follower of Myrtle; Kormar the Deathshaper; Lord Dinosaur; Big Branch
Setting Phillipian Estate, Gellian
Date 9/10/25
Quotes n/a
QP 0
Other Info n/a


Airship

Other Information

House Rules

QP System

Level QP Needed
2-3 3
4 6
5-20 9

Other House Rules

Renown Factions

Faction History/Details Beliefs Goals
Runestar Foundation Following the Quan'thosk'alys Wars, many powerful and dangerous artifacts on the Twin Worlds are unaccounted for. Byron Runestar created the secret foundation to track down and safely store these artifacts.
  • Dangerous artifacts should be wielded by those who will use them responsible, or they should be sealed away.
  • Operate in secret, avoiding the pitfalls of political and international strife.
To take possession of powerful artifacts for safekeeping.
Fists of Vengeance The Fists of Vengeance are a group of rogue ex-monks that got sick and tired of ignoring the problems the peasants faced from greedy dishonest nobles. After witnessing a massacre of helpless innocents, the order was formed by a dark haired monk named Raven Silverhawk. She asked her monastic order to respond to the attack and avenge and protect the peasants, but the order replied that the nobles had the law on their side. Frustrated she left the order and took the matter of justice into her own hands, and the Fists of Vengeance was born.
  • Avenge and protect the oppressed
  • Channel your avenging anger into powerful ki abilities.
To stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves and strike a blow to injustice.
High Temple of Valos Dedicated to Valos, Valkyrie Goddess of Valor. One of the oldest and most respected faiths on the Twin Worlds. Their paladins and knights serve in honorable kingdoms, seeking to give the wicked no quarter.
  • Act with honor and valor in all things.
Oppose evil creature and dark gods, particularly Vina, Goddess of Terror and Dischord.
Gruffmarble Mercenary Guild A rising power in the mercenary business. Led by Cadman Gruffmarble from its HQ in Gloecoast.
  • Fight and adventure to expand the prestige of Gruffmarble Mercenary Guild.
  • Don't be afraid to play rough to get the job done. If the cause is justified, then the ends justify the means.
To grow the reputation of Gruffmarble as a competent and reliable mercenary guild.
House Tealgoblet Information Network Run by the halfling Jahoel House Tealgoblet, the Grey Gatherers trade in information. Often members are working towards a personal goal, and are in turn helping others as well.
  • Trade information with other members of the network.
  • Provide safe haven to network members when needed.
  • Do not betray the interests of House Tealgoblet.
To create a secret network of information brokers and safe houses.

Faction Ranks

Renown Runestar Foundation
(Rheya)
Fists of Vengeance
(Hallon)
High Temple of Valos
(Kaiden)
Gruffmarble Mercenary Guild
(Myrtle)
House Tealgoblet Information Network
(Isocerus)
1 Recruit Student of the Way Initiate Sellsword Green Informant
3 Agent Practioner of the Avenging Fist Disciple Journeyman Mercenary Red Whisperer
10 Lead Agent Master of the Protecting Palm Holy Knight Mercenary Squad Captain Violet Secretkeeper
25 Operations Commander Grandmaster Who Opposes Oppression Knight-Commander Mercenary Commander Grey Gatherer
50 Foundation Leader True Master of Liberating Strikes Exalted Highknight Mercenary High Commander Black Broker

Faiths